Wednesday, March 5, 2008

Paper Boy

Five reasons Paperboy is the greatest video game of all time:

-It instilled a proper sense of capitalism
Paperboy was rewarded for vandalizing non-subscribers' property

-It taught a proper work ethic
Paperboy did not get any day off during the week

-It drew a clear distinction between right and wrong
Non-subscribers houses were darkened to symbolize their status as the enemy

-It taught a proper attitude toward work
When paperboy took a break on his bicycyle, killer bees attacked

-It marked a proper contrast between suburbia and the inner city
Break dancers were clearly trouble and were to be smacked with newspapers whenever possible